KEY TAKEAWAY: I May Be Wrong by Björn Natthiko Lindeblad offers gentle yet profound insights into navigating life’s uncertainties with greater acceptance, mindfulness, and humility. Through personal stories and timeless wisdom, the book encourages us to release control, question our thoughts, and approach life’s challenges with compassion—both for ourselves and others. It’s a reminder that peace comes not from being right, but from embracing the unknown and letting go of what we cannot control. Scroll down to the TAKE ACTION section for this week’s actionable steps.

Today, I want to share with you a book that came into my life just recently and also at the right time. Have you ever had that happen to you? That a message is delivered by a book at just the right time that you need it. Well, this book was that for me this month, this year.

It’s called I May Be Wrong: And Other Wisdoms From Life as a Forest Monk, and was written by Björn Natthiko Lindeblad, a Swede who left a successful career to go to Thailand to become a forest monk and many years later returned to Sweden, a journey to and fro that was not without bumps in both directions, and he shares insights from his own humbling journey with kindness and good humor. That he has since passed from ALS, something he knew about when writing the book, just makes what he shared even more telling to me.

The book is light and easy to read, and each short chapter is a seamless blend of storytelling and insight, feeling like a soft lesson where Björn Natthiko shares something deeply personal but always leaves space for us, the readers, to reflect on our own lives.

While there were so many things I could share—my now dogeared copy is a testament to that—there are four pearls of wisdom that especially resonated, and I continue to revisit and want to share with you in today’s video. I hope they resonate with you, too.

Idea #1: Don’t believe your every thought.

Have you ever listened to your thoughts? I mean, really listened, as if you were a third person listening in on someone else’s conversation? If you did, what would you hear?

Well, there’s a reason why the voice of our thoughts is often called the inner critic. Because frequently, the thoughts are saying not very nice things, and if the negative voice is not directed at ourselves—which it so often is—then it’s negatively commenting on someone or something else that is not up to snuff.

You’re not enough of something—not good enough, not smart enough, not experienced enough, not skilled enough, not charismatic enough, not tall enough, not thin enough, not pretty enough, not charming enough, or some other not-enoughness.

You’re too much of something—too old, too young, too overweight, too unfit, too loud, too quiet, too needy, too insecure, too lazy, too emotional.

It may be telling you why you should or should not do something, not to put yourself out there, and not risk being seen as all the things you are worried you might be seen as.

And, as mentioned, if the thoughts aren’t focused on negative things about yourself, they are focused on what else in your life, the world, or something or someone else that isn’t up to snuff.

“’Don’t believe your every thought.’ Few things have helped me more in life. Unfortunately, that superpower, which we all possess, is often overlooked. But the fact is that approaching our own thoughts with a measure of scepticism and humour makes it infinitely easier to be you and me. So, what do you gain from now unquestioningly believing every thought that flashes through your mind? Something as invaluable as a true and genuine inner confident. Someone who is always on your side…We don’t choose our thoughts…We can’t control what pops into our minds. We can only choose whether or not to believe it.”¹

So, what if you didn’t believe your every thought? What if you opened the door to not believing them, especially the critical, judgemental, spiteful, questioning, and complaining thoughts—and instead just let them come and then go, without attaching to them, without identifying them? Try it.

To help you with this, two things:

• Start to listen to your thoughts as if you were a neutral observer listening to someone else’s conversation. What’s being said? About you, your life, your abilities, your body?
• Ask yourself, what if you didn’t believe every thought? What if you could just notice them and then let them go without holding onto them or reacting to them? What difference could it make to how you feel, how you live, and what you do or don’t do—if you didn’t believe every thought?

Try it, and before I head onto the next idea I want to share, I’ll leave you with this. The next time you are having thoughts that are not enriching how you feel or your life, try this on:

“Thanks for your input. We’ll get back to you.”

Idea #2: I may be wrong.

The title of the book and something that has been a tremendous help to me of late. The title was inspired by a lesson that Björn Natthiko relays in the book that was given by one of his teachers. During one of the night lectures that occurred, the teacher said the following:

“Tonight I want to give you a magic mantra…The next time you sense a conflict brewing, when you feel things are about to come to a head with someone, just repeat this mantra to yourself three times, sincerely and convincingly—in any language you want—and your worries will evaporate, like dew from the grass on a summer morning…I may be wrong, I may be wrong, I may be wrong.”¹

And guess what? It works! I can’t tell you how many times I have used it with my husband—we’ve been married since 1993 but can still dig in our heels and squabble like kids.

When I remind myself “I may be wrong”—whether it’s in the moment or after, when I catch myself stewing about words exchanged—my rigid ideas, my unyielding emotions, my stubborn righteousness eases. Sometimes gives away and allows space for some other possibility.

And I’ve used it with others, too—during or even after difficult or uncomfortable conversations. After all, in today’s world—as I’m sure so many people thought in their day’s world—there seems to be so much to disagree about, to react to with anger or frustration. I am no exception. Yet, when I can make myself recall these four words, it feels better.

Because you know what? I may just very well be wrong. I don’t know everything. No one does. We are all wrong at times. Often, many times.

Try it now. Think about some recent conflict or words you exchanged with someone. Then, think about what you were so very sure of. , and repeat, “I may be wrong,” three times. How do you feel?

Try it the next time you find yourself in a situation where there may be getting tense, where a conflict may be brewing or heads starting to butt. Repeat to yourself:

I may be wrong.
I may be wrong.
I may be wrong.

What is the result?

Remember: You may just be wrong. As Björn Natthiko reminds us, there is freedom in detaching from the need to constantly “know” or be “right.”

And even if you are right, let me close this idea with another wisdom from another of Bjorn Natthiko’s teachers: “Being right is never the point.”¹ In other words, what you lose in trying to be right may be much greater than you gain.

Idea #3: Unclench the fist.

Clench your fist. Hold it clenched for ten seconds. Now, release it. What do you feel?

Some relief? Release?

Not surprising. After all, as stated in the book,

“’Chaos may rattle you, but order can kill you.’ Right, I was clenching my fist too hard again. I was imagining I knew what the world should look like. And when it didn’t conform to my ideas, I seized up. Thoughts with the word “should” in them make me small, dull, and lonely.”¹

What about you? Do you ever find yourself clenching tightly to an idea of how things or people “should” be?

I do. In fact, I talk about it in my own book in the section on cultivating inner peace because, at least for me, for so long, peace was about controlling everything around me as much as I could in order to secure some blessed peace if only for a short amount of time, and part of that was wanting to mold things into what I thought they should be like.

Of course, it’s an exhausting approach and, even more to the point, a futile one. There will always, always, always be something that is happening to or around me—something that is challenging or not as I think or wish it should or would be.

In other words, life is uncertain. Everything in it is uncertain. The only certainty is death, yet we still strive to force certainty onto situations and onto other people. It is almost endearing how much effort we expend on trying to exert control, and no matter how often we receive the lesson, “You can’t control this,” we still try.

Acceptance may be one of the most challenging words to actually do but resistance can frankly kill. For sure, it can drain the joy from life and create stress that can wreak havoc in our lives and with our mental and physical health.

So, next time you feel yourself clenching tightly—when you’re trying to exert a control you cannot exert, when you’re trying to mold something or someone to be as you think they should be but can’t—consider unclenching and letting go just a bit and accepting, with slightly more open hands, just a bit more.

Idea #4: “The world is not as it is. The world is as you are. So, be what you want to see in it.”

The world is not as it is. The world is as you are. So, be what you want to see in it.”¹

One of the most, if not the most, powerful choices I have found that I can make is to choose the lens through which I view life, life situations, myself, and others. It is a seemingly simple yet profound choice that has profound effects on my quality of life and being.

We get to choose that lens. It’s up to us. We get to choose how we perceive and respond to different things that happen to and around us in life. We are the only ones who can choose that for ourselves.

It’s a simple choice but not always an easy one. We get into the habit of knee-jerk reacting to situations we don’t like instead of taking a step back to consider how the lens through which we’re viewing and reacting to the situation is affecting us, those around us, and ultimately, the outcome.

One quote that stood out to me that relates to this is, “It is possible to live a good life even if things don’t turn out the way we hope.”¹ Happiness and peace don’t come from perfect circumstances but from how we relate to whatever happens.

Again, we come back to acceptance. Simple, not so easy.

So, when you find yourself dealing with a situation you don’t like, what if you took the gift of the pause and took a mental and maybe even a physical step back to consider the lens through which you’re viewing and reacting to the situation? What if you chose a lens that would help you feel a bit better about things and deal with them better, too?

To help you with this, try on some gratitude. Gratitude is another one of those simple yet profound tools that we can use to help us make the lens through which we’re viewing and reacting to things a much more self-supporting one. Ultimately, viewing life through a negative or cup-half-empty lens creates resistance and stress and detracts from our well-being and lives in general.

It’s a tool I can forget about, but when I find myself in a negative thought spiral, without fail, when I remember to start listing all I’m grateful for, it never fails to not just get me out of my negative thought spiraling but make me feel pretty good.

I used it recently when we had to pay for a whole new roof. Not only were we paying money I hadn’t expected to pay, but the work was not going as I thought it should be going. Soon, I was on the full-blown pity pot, and my negative thoughts were extending to everything in my life that was challenging at the time.

However, I finally remembered gratitude. I started listing all that I had to be grateful for, including that I even had a roof over my head to worry about fixing. The more things I listed, the more things I found to be grateful for, and not only was I soon out of my pity pot, but I was feeling on top of the world.

Gratitude works. Research backs this, so if you find yourself stuck when it comes to how you are viewing some situation, and you know you would better serve yourself and the outcome you want by shifting that lens, try on a bit of gratitude and see if that helps. Start listing all the things that you’re grateful for, starting with as small of thing as you need to, which you may have to do because it can be difficult to think of things to be thankful for when you’re caught up in woe-is-me, why-me laments. Then, see what happens. See how you feel.

Remember: The buck starts and ends with us, and that includes how we choose to perceive ourselves, others, and our lives. We get to choose that, and the choice we make will determine the quality of what we experience.

Final Thoughts

While there is so much more sweet wisdom and insight to discover in this easy-to-read but hard-to-put-down (or forget) book, I’ll let you make your own discoveries in its light, humorous, humble, and ultimately uplifting pages.

However, if you want help, as the description on the back of the book says, “to let go of the small stuff, accept the things you cannot control, manage difficult emotions, and face yourself—and others—without judgment,”¹ then check out I May Be Wrong. Whether you’re interested in personal growth, spiritual exploration, or simply looking for a fresh perspective on how to navigate life’s uncertainties, then you may find, as I did, just what you need when you need it.

TAKE ACTION:

Try the following to help implement in a practical way some of the wisdom shared in I May Be Wrong:

1. Challenge Your Thoughts: Spend 5 minutes each day observing your thoughts as if you were an outsider. When a critical or negative thought arises, practice saying, “I don’t have to believe this.” Notice how it feels to let go of that thought rather than getting caught up in it.
2. Try Using “I May Be Wrong” More: The next time you feel conflict or tension building in a conversation, silently repeat the phrase “I may be wrong” three times before responding. See how it shifts your emotions and softens your approach.
3. Unclench Your Fist: Identify one area of your life where you’re clinging to control or perfectionism. Each day, consciously choose to release some of that control—whether it’s at work, in your relationships, or in how you view yourself. Reflect on the changes this brings to how you feel and your peace of mind.
4. Shift Your Perspective with Gratitude: Whenever you find yourself frustrated or upset, pause and write down three things you’re grateful for in that moment. Shifting to gratitude can help you see life through a more positive lens and reduce stress.

References:

1: Lindeblad, Björn Natthiko (2022). I may be wrong: And other wisdoms from life as a forest monk. Mudlark.

IMPORTANT: The information provided is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended to be a substitute for professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of a qualified professional with any questions you may have regarding the topics discussed here as the topics discussed are based on general principles and may not be applicable to every individual. 

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